I am not sure about you, but for me, I have not felt like I am who I am lately.

Reading that last sentence to check for punctuation, I was struck by I AM WHO I AM.

I Am that I Am (Hebrew: אֶהְיֶה אֲשֶׁר אֶהְיֶה‎, pronounced Ehyeh asher ehyeh [ʔehˈje ʔaˈʃer ʔehˈje]) is a common English translation (JPS among others) of the response God used in the Hebrew Bible when Moses asked for his name (Exodus 3:14). It is one of the most famous verses in the Torah. Hayah means "existed" or "was" in Hebrew; "ehyeh" is the first person singular imperfect form and is usually translated in English Bibles as "I will be" (or "I shall be"), for example, at Exodus 3:12. Ehyeh asher ehyeh is generally interpreted to mean I am that I am, though it can also be translated as "I-shall-be that I-shall-be."[1]
In revealing his mysterious name, YHWH ("I AM HE WHO IS", "I AM WHO AM" or "I AM WHO I AM"), God says who he is and by what name he is to be called. This divine name is mysterious just as God is mystery. It is at once a name revealed and something like the refusal of a name, and hence it better expresses God as what he is - infinitely above everything that we can understand or say: he is the "hidden God", his name is ineffable, and he is the God who makes himself close to men.

 In writing the first sentence...I didn't mean it like that but I do NOW :) Sort of.

See, I have been wrestling the with Lord, with myself.  I still am actually. 

I am not happy with so many things write now.  Most are things I can't really do anything about, but some ARE things I can do something about and I have just chosen not to for so long it's hard to know how to start again.

Well I have started a study with a group of ladies and I am so excited. 

I use this blog, one as a means of telling others about what's going on, secondly as a way that others will know what happened in my life after the fact, {whipering}when I am d-e-a-d. 



So, it's important to me to tell the story.

So, I have a junk email. It was my original email that turned into junk form giving out the address so many times.  Now it has over 9, 000 (I checked to make sure I wasn't exaggerating).  I occasionally go into that box to look for an expected email...well one day I saw the unexpected email. While the Vatican would not constitute this a miracle--it was of sorts.  LOL! 

In an email---I had been invited to join a group of ladies in the Beth Moore bible study of James. 

Every time something HUGE has happened in my life, it can be linked in some way to a season of deep intense bible study.  It is not anything magical. It's biblical.

Fast Forward...So I am going through the study. Committed to be ready for the Lord to speak to me. Though I wasn't sure if He would [wink, wink].

It happened 1-22-12, Week 2 Day 2 of the study.  The Lord knows I love patterns ;)

While I will not bore you with all the specifics I will say it was like everything I studied I would write notes in the margin and then the notes I wrote would tie right in to the very next thing she would teach.  Maybe it's just coincidence but the Lord uses coincidence ;)

One thing I wrote was: "Oh Lord I am so thankful that you take the time, when I am flailing like a two year old not wiling to make eye contact, and steady my head, lift it and force me to look at you face." 

Then the next sentence said-I do not lie- "You are gazing in the face of a solid-gold assurance" pg. 50


Ok I realized upon reading--it doesn't sound near as exciting because that moment had been building up and it was MY moment....but I had to tell you about it.

This short update has become wordy and I must get on with my day.  However, if you are looking for something juicy and good!  Try this study!

Here is a link with a video, and sample texts:
http://www.lifeway.com/James-Mercy-Triumphs/c/N-1z10gpu

I also am going to facilitate this study in my home on Tuesday nights beginning in February. 

Please pray. Thank you so much!

I am feeling much more like I am ;)

4 comments:

Lori said...

I think your moment was MOMENTOUS and wonderful! Don't you love it when you hear the Lord speak directly to you?

I enjoyed your paragraph about "I AM," as I have just last night started reading Marilyn Hickey's "The Names of God." Chapter one has me hooked! We miss so much by not knowing the Hebrew words. God doesn't nearly begin to convey what He IS. I have never been much on facilitating - I'd much rather be a participant. However, after last night's reading, I am going to pray about leading a ladies' group on this book.

I marvel with you and pray for you as you journey!

Anonymous said...

I have the books by Spangler (Names of God and Names of Jesus) and loved both of them as it helped me to see Who God IS - and it appears all 3 of us are enjoying this enlightenment of Him! I'm praying that you get off the spiritual plateau and begin movin' on up like the Jefferson's in your spiritual walk! Love ya!

The Ottesens said...

I LOVE those moments! It is like Jesus showing how personal He is with us :) LOVE THIS!

Unknown said...

I understand where you were and am where you were. The Lord has been bringing that particular study to mind lately...might be for a reason.
Keep up the God work.