"The next time I would return to that journal would be post stroke, post hospital stay, post realizing I had a brush with death. I could not even face what I wrote on the eve of my stroke for weeks. I knew. I knew that I had wanted to die but GOD had allowed me to live." Expert from blog listed below.
It's long, but it's a story that I hope those that love me will take the time to read. Especially those new to my life. Honestly, it has made me who I am today.
This was written 3 years ago on the 1 year anniversary of my 1st stroke.
Click here-The HEART of it~10/28/2009
|We were posing and the guys thought it would be funny to tip the pew! |
So "MY" family!
***10/27 which would be the eve of my stroke and significant for me because it's when I wrote my journal entry.
I am sitting here preparing for the rivalry Florida Georgia Game today. Our family is gathering. My son-in-love is smoking meat and all of my family will be there; extended in-laws and friends as well. I can't help thinking how RICH my life is. I have a brand new precious grand-daughter. We are foster parents to a 3 year old blessing. We are second-grandparents to 2 precious joys with another on the way. Our son is growing into a man. Our lives are blessed! I have since had another stroke that did leave me with some health problems that I have battled. I am fighting the "thorn in my flesh" , of depression with suicidal ideation, with medication and the WORD OF GOD! It has not been an easy journey. It is a journey, though, that I thank God every day that I get to make!
Looking at this image I think, I would have never seen my daughter marry. I would have never seen ANY of these babies had God given me my way. The truth is, I didn't WANT to die. I suffer from an illness. It's a battle that I fight. Though I do not have to fight alone...look at the good things the Lord has done!